When Eating Isn't Easy
Preferring Goldfish crackers to blueberries might not seem like a healthy choice, but if you’re a toddler, it means your brain development is right on track. As tiny bodies begin to explore the world and categorize things, ever-predictable Goldfish seem much safer than blueberries, which can be tart or sweet, squishy or firm. If part of the brain’s goal is to help us avoid poisoning ourselves, you can understand why a smiling cracker would pass the test, while unknown fruits and vegetables may not. The role of parents and caregivers is to help kids recategorize foods, moving them from the realm of unknown to known … and hopefully all the way to “yum.”
Two private schools in Oklahoma City built food programs around this mission, using research-based methods and lots of experience. Tai Allen brings her expertise as an occupational therapist to Wesley Kids Montessori Preschool, where staff offer a low-pressure, autonomy-based approach to food. Mackenzie Bentley, chef and head of childhood nutrition at Trinity School, uses her experience and emphasis on relationships to bring picky eaters and people with learning differences into the kitchen and to the table. At both schools, exposure is key.
“The starting place for a picky child might be tolerating touching the foods or having them on their plates,” says Tai Allen. “The exploration might be tonging the broccoli onto their plate or scooping the rice. It might be dipping the carrot into ranch dip and licking the ranch off of the carrot. These are great strides toward exploring foods and increasing positive interactions with foods on their terms.”
Tai encourages adults to invite children into the kitchen to wash fruit or cut a veggie. Children in the kitchen may slow the process, but perhaps that’s for the best. “Our world is moving away from long periods of time in the home, but our kids really need that foundation of eating at home to experience that cooking is fun, that food is fun,” she says. The influence of inviting kids back into the kitchen will far outlast dinner time.
At Wesley Kids, children can prepare a snack for themselves at any time, and children have autonomy over when to eat and how much to eat. Inviting a classmate to the snack table is encouraged. Snacks are simple and typically consist of two components, one familiar and one not-so-familiar. For example, Tai says, “A snack may consist of strawberries and seaweed snacks.” Some children take both options and others take only one. Over time children begin to show more boldness in their food choices.
Tai sees a child’s openness to trying new things really bloom in the garden as well. From seed to sprout to pinching a plump tomato from the vine and taking a bite, students are invited to taste and see the process of growing food. Tai says children graze the garden, popping arugula and mint in their mouths as they play. The garden offers a positive, low-pressure interaction with food.
At Trinity, the kids Mackenzie Bentley feeds are mostly older (the school is K-12), but the principles and the challenges are the same. Many of the children at Trinity are diagnosed with a sensory processing disorder, autism, or ARFID (avoidance-resistance food in-take disorder), all of which can make the brain persistently categorize unknown foods as undesirable. Kids with food anxiety and textural aversions may not get the nutrition they need at meal times. This can affect their academic performance and social interactions, not to mention the fact that a severely limited diet can be detrimental to health.
“Chef Mac,” as the kids call her, offers a predictable, yet varied menu. “Monday is Italian or pasta, Wednesday is Asian, Thursday is some kind of Americana,” she says. Mackenzie prepares homemade, nutrient-dense, but approachable meals for the students. Pho is a particularly popular dish. “We have kids who start the year absolutely refusing anything green on their plate, like garnishes for pho. By the end of the year, they ask for a big salad to ‘keep them healthy,’” she says.
Mackenzie gets creative and caters to individual needs. “I really love bowls—throw everything together—but that doesn’t work for some of our kids,” she says. Sauces are a point of agreement between the chef and the students. She asserts that sauces complete a meal, and the kids love the option to dip their food.
Mackenzie’s extensive experience offers an elevated approach to school lunch. A graduate of The Coach House apprenticeship, she has worked at a Michelin star restaurant and served as an executive chef for multiple restaurants before making her home at Trinity. When asked why she chose a school cafeteria when she could be anywhere, she pauses, exhales and begins telling story after story of the students she serves at Trinity. “The kids express such gratitude; so do their parents. It keeps me going.”
Tai is also driven by the impact and gratitude she sees. She recalls a parent who sent a box of Cheez-its to school with their child, explaining, “This is the only thing they eat.” Tai obliged and held onto the box, but never saw a moment to use it. When this child, known as a picky eater, began to see other children eat and try new foods, they decided to branch out. Now they are on their way to becoming an adventurous eater, at home and school.
Seeing where food came from and enjoying it with someone else has proven benefits, no matter how old you are. If you have kids at home (or a food-challenged adult in your life), you can use the same low-pressure approach as Wesley Kids and Trinity to help broaden palates and fill plates.
Tips:
Set the bar low for exposure; just touching a food or having it on their plate counts.
Food should be fun, not stressful. A little mess is okay. Don’t force kids to leave their comfort zone.
Get kids involved in the kitchen or in the garden at whatever level is accessible for your family. Plating packaged foods still counts as “helping make dinner.”
Offer a “safe” food and a new food together, and keep it simple so kids won’t get overwhelmed by options.
Encourage independence and autonomy whenever you can. Offer choices and self-serve options.
